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You know you have teenagers when....

You are the first one up in the morning!

All those years spent praying for a decent sleep in, the early morning duties, spooning soggy weetbix into little cherubs greedy mouths, smiling back through sleep encrusted bleary eyes, holding your breath during that early morning nappy retrieval, the joy in four loads of washing by 8am..............

And now you are the first one up, not at that much dreamt about 9am, but bright and early by 7am, tip-toeing around the house marvelling at how life changes, how fast it moves and how, despite the bumps, we need to appreciate every single moment.

A week until Christmas!!!

I can hardly believe it.

Don't think that I am going to crack that magic 100 mark by Xmas but that's ok.

My restriction is pretty good but my choices haven't been that great, it's amazing how the lapband protests to funny things like the skin on grapes but doesn't bat an eye at chocolate.

I haven't been drinking anything alcoholic and that has certainly helped move the scales.

I could also use a little of that magical excercise thing, and I am hoping the motivation to do that is hidden in the new year.

In the new year I will be working on a new project for three months, I will be able to dictate my hours and with the girls on holidays that is likely to be a 7am start so I can finish early, hit the gym and still be home by 5pm.

Hopefully after three months of excercise I will have hit the point of no return and continue.

Things at work have improved and I am sort of in limbo - heading into a new project but not sure of what is on the other side.

All the presents are wrapped under the tree - a first for this time of year.  There are a few more things I want to get the younger girls but essentially I am done - it feels good!

Oh What does the week bring.....

A total load of shit at work and a 1.4kg loss.

Maybe the scales knew I needed a boost this week?  It was a shocker.

Started well, ended really badly.

Worst thing is I feel so totally let down.

I am not a 'get to know you & feel like friends' type of person.

But when I do 'get to know you & feel like friends' and you let me down it is pretty bad for me.

Worst still, I can't escape from you, you sit next to me and have input into every minute of my working day.

If you are having a hissy and not speaking it is really uncomfortable.

I shouldn't have to work this way............it's not fair...........but you hold all the power because you won your position and I am just filling in............such is life..........the money isn't worth this.........

Shame I love the job.........

Arghhhhhh

These small losses and the seemingly required up/down monthly cycle are doing my head in.

I have THREE weeks until my next fill - sheesh seems a million years away.

Up by 400 grams this week - no surprises there, my boobs feel like aching, swollen rocks, my mood is crappy and it all means one thing - TTOM is upon me - gawd I really thought it was only just over wahhh!

I suffer from PMDD and my cycle can be extreme to say the least.  I really need to start taking Evening Primrose again as this does help with the fluid retention quite a bit.  As for the rest, well I continue to pray the Zoloft is enough this month and that the Imigran will knock the migraines out first go.

And of course I should haul my lazy butt off to the gym, found my membership card yesterday so that excuse is gone.....

More fashion.....

Just because it was snagged at 40% off!!!

OLD NAVY - casual weekend wear

This does NOT have the white top under it so I am putting it with this top instead

Exhausting

Is the whole business of life really.

When did it become exhausting?  Somewhere between work, children and husband I suppose.

Try as I might to keep my head above water I quite often feel the rip dragging me back down somehow......

Hmm I think they can tell.....

Over the last few days I have heard these statements not once but several times

"Wow that's a really nice top"
"Have you had your hair done?  It's looks really pretty today"

Very flattering and totally fantaboulous for my self esteem of course and I am sure it is because people are noticing a change but can't quite pin-point what it is or don't want to say the dreaded "Have you lost weight?"

I am loving it and also loving clothes shopping!  OMG I have done so much shopping it is crazy.  Need to settle it down a bit and start getting ready for Xmas I think.

But just to share some of the outfits I have been putting together for work:

From Gap



From Old Navy:

2 months 1 day and 12.1 kgs.....

Tracking back down......

I have some restriction, if I eat too much it is like a rock in my chest so I don't go there.. for me it is, and probably always will be about food choices.

Oh I was at work the other day, having my crackers and tuna for lunch - now I usually have cruskits but we didn't have any so I grabbed some Ryvita's - ummmm NO! 

Whether it was because I didn't chew enough, or they are just too dense I was like UhOh......this is what they all talk about.........sharp pain in the middle of the chest, feeling the need to burp, sneak of to the bathroom.........nothing, now I have a total aversion to being sick so I was quite happy I wasn't, it must have worked it's way down but let me tell you, lunch was well and truly over for me that day!

Why do we do it?

Eat the things we know we shouldn't.

Travelling along quite nicely until the afternoon meeting where I produced two bowls of lollies for the group to share - yeah right what a joke really I wanted a few myself didn't I.

Then after dinner, having to drop Miss 11 at her modelling classes of course I decided that it would be a good idea to get the twins a reward of McFlurries for being the two most sane people in the house.  Of course this meant I could justify a chocolate sundae for myself, and as I was ordering the word large came out of my mouth all of its own accord.

About halfway through eating this I realised that I was staring 502 calories right in the face (as per Calorie King my new best/worst enemy) so to make myself feel a little better at the 3/4 mark I started feeding my darling Cavaliers the rest, incidently they both ADORE icecream.

So in one day I have managed to encourage my children in the belief that a McFlurry is a suitable reward,  fed my darling Cavaliers completely empty calories and made more excuses to myself about bad food choices than Kevin Rudd did about mining taxes.

I did however save myself   125 calories from that damn sundae and scored myself a free Big Mac voucher because they took more than three minutes to serve me my cup of fat - yay me!

Still under my Calorie King daily allowance.....

Much the same

But I am not too disapointed - I expected it.

I have put on 200 grams - in the scheme of things, this is nothing. 

A bit of a shakeup though, get back on track, stick to the plan, just because you can eat it doesn't mean you should!

2.5ml and 1.5ml = 4ml

That is what we are up to.

Doesn't feel any different yet, maybe it will in the morning?

I have to giggle at the number of people my Dr sees on his visits - about 150 each day on the Saturday and Sunday. Hmmmm now 150 x $140= $21,000 x 2 = $42,000 no wonder my Mum told me to marry a Dr!!!!!

It goes something like this.....

Hello's as you walk up the hallway, jump on the scales - good they are going down, jump on the bed, he is a master filler - in and out in seconds, have a drink before you go & seeya in six weeks.

But I love him, the no nonsense, no bullshit style is perfect!

Blah Blah Blah

Is about how I have felt since I decided a chicken burger would be a good idea on Wednesday.

Ok half a chicken burger because you all know a whole chicken burger isn't going to work.

I swear it really wasn't that great, straight away I felt yuck - too full, grossed out and pretty darn dissapointed in myself.

Maybe that's an over-reaction, I mean it was half a burger right?

Should have stuck to my cruskits and tuna!

Finally - Photo Update 12kgs down - can you tell?

Ok apart from being a little blurry I don't think there is any doubt that 12kgs makes a HUGE difference! 

I was a little hesitant putting these up, but do you know what - anyone thinking about a lapband needs to see the remarkable difference that it can make!

Want to see the rest of the pics?  Leave a comment with your email address and I will email you the password.

9/8/10 One week before surgery                     

  5/10/10 Seven Weeks Later
  

An old post resurrected....just because!

The Treasure Box

Looks a little bit like this in my imagination.



It sits at the back of my mind and whenever required I carefully lift the lid about an inch, hurriedly drop my latest problem or issue in it and VOILA problem gone!

Over the years I have replaced the bursting hinges, added a couple of new locks and sat on it a couple of times.

There is really some serious shit in there.

I recommend it for all of those that think things are too hard, think its all too much.

Get a treasure box fill the fucker and get on with it.

Oh I am really quite good after all.....

No football final blow out - my sister in law is doing a new diet - 'healthy inspirations' and instead of the usual junky lunch on offer she made some amazing, healthy and totally delish dishes.

I loved the spinach, tomato and mushroom frittata it was sooooo yummy!

We ended up coming home just after midnight, I drove, got stopped by a breathalyser......there is something very satisying about getting pulled over with a car full of drunk people and being 0.00, it's just such a 'see I am such a good girl officer' moment.

Of course getting home and joining in with the drunken people and being awake when the sun came up may have been something I could have lived without, talk about seedy!  On a positive though I did not eat all the usual junk foods while drinking, and did not have a big KFC recovery meal either...............sleep and water work a treat!

Hope everyone has seen the weight watchers mini-meals - perfect for work lunches.

I have had the creamy mushroom penne and creamy tuna penne, both taste quite good for a frozen meal, and the size is brilliant for a bandit.

Weekly update

Yes it's two days early, but what can I say tomorrow is Grand Final day - again, and I don't plan on being very good, and I don't plan on doing much of anything on Sunday either.

Drum-roll please .............. another 1.5 kgs GONE - wooohooo!

I couldn't be happier.

I thought around Tuesday that this may be an interesting week as suddenly the fill I had two weeks ago seems to have kicked in and I am full after a slice of toast. 

Its also been really strange as one day I was full after a slice of toast, the next I hate half a serve of sweet and sour pork and was quite surprised with what I managed, that night three mouthfuls and bang - full again!

This whole lapband jopurney is really interesting.

I also think that I may have actually lost more weight the week prior but because it was that time of the month it didn't reflect on the scales.

I wore my first size 'Large' top yesterday and have a draw full of clothes ready to grow into!

Very exciting times.

So six weeks since surgery and nearly 12 kilos gone - I am completely happy with that!

40 days and 40 nights

Is how long I have had my lapband in for and I have lost 10.2kgs.  Have a look at the weight tally page for my progress.

At them moment I am losing around half a kilo a week which although it feels somewhat slow to me is actually perfect because it will (hopefully) allow my skin the time it needs to shrink back to my new body.

I am still convinced that I will need a stomach tuck, mostly because of the skin that was stretched out after having the twins and never bounced back despite being around 65kgs AFTER they where born - wow that seems a lifetime ago!

Plus I will need a breast lift and maybe a teensy tiny implant just because I can.

Back at work for two weeks now which of course has been the reason for my lack of blogging.  Will absolutely promise to do a weekly update every Sunday, and some in betweens as I can.

I am eating everything now, there is nothing that I can't eat, I believe that makes me one of the lucky banded people.  No issues with meat. bread or anything like that, I just eat much less than I used to.

And it's funny how your mindset changes, yesterday for example being grandfinal day and a complete shocker of a day nutrition/eating wise I was like hmmmmmmm did I eat too much?

1/2 ham and cheese toasted sandwich, 1 piece toast with vegemite, 1/2 KFC snack box, the head of a caramello koala, 1 piece of toast with one egg, three drinks watching the footy and a few handfulls of chips.

Now once upon a time this would have been:

A whole hame and cheese toasted sandwich, 3 pieces of toast with vegemite, a whole KFC meal, the whole caramello koala, probably 12 drinks, a few handfulls of chips PLUS dips/cheese/biscuits etc because the footy would have been the perfect excuse right?  Plus I would have cooked a big family meal to end the day because I always cook the best after a few drinks.

I think I can stop worrying about yesterday!

It was certainly not the best nutrition wise but today is a new day.

Emily's Quest To Be Miss Fashion 2011

Well after her debut in Miss Country Girl Tasmania, Miss Emily really wants to compete in Miss Fashion 2011 being held in Townsville.

So the ticket selling and fund-raising commence!

First of all she needs to sell 500 tickets to enter, between work, school and home I don't think this will be a problem.

Then of course we need the funds to get her there and make it happen!

We have six months to raise enough for airfares and accomadation costs - anyone have any sure-fire fundraising ideas?

Totally out of control

No - not with the lapband, that is all going well, my first 'fill' is this Saturday which is great.

I can see those calories creeping up over the last two weeks - 800, 900, 1000, 1100 - now hovering at around 1200 a day but I feel good and a small fill will get me back down to the 1000 calorie mark which seems to be the optimum for bandits.

What is totally out of control is our weather here in Tassie.  It is blowing a gale!

All I can hear is the wind ripping through the trees, over roofs and rain pelting down.  The dogs are scared senseless and barking at every creak and groan of the fences.

Hopefully it clears up somwhat tomorrow because I am meant to be heading down to Hobart for Miss Em's 'Little Miss Country Girl Tasmania' debut!  Oh the things we do.

Will update in full on Sunday, the first week back at work has been a shocker! 

First abusive customer seen today and he was a doosie, standing 30cm away from me screaming abuse into my face what a charmer!