Saturday, January 12, 2008

Disappointment in your child

PhotobucketDisappointment in your child is just a feeling of pain. It is a little like a catch of your breath a sinking sensation in your stomach and a head that seems to float around somewhere out of your reach.

You close your eyes and ears hoping that perhaps, just maybe, what they have told you isn't true.

When you realise it is true, I think the parenting part of your brain kicks into gear and you turn into this amazing (often not completely appreciated) tower of strength for them, you let them cry on your shoulder and wonder why you aren't the one crying.

You provide the most well balanced advice you can think of and do everything you can to love and support them through whatever difficulty has befallen them this time.

Quite often you may do this at the expense of your other children because you reason, quite certainly they will have their turn one day too and after all you would do just the same for them.

What happens when you have been through all of this not once, not twice, not even three times.

What if it just continues to happen?

What if its like a merry go round spinning crazily out of control. Its spinning so topsy turvy over and over and over again.

What do you do and say then?

When all the words you have, and some you didn't even realise you have, are spoken and your child just keeps jumping on that crazy giddy merry go round?

What do you do then?

Do you jump back on again with them, and try try some more?

Or do you stand back and watch them spin?

After parenting for nearly 21 years, I just don't know the answer.

I wish I did, truly I do.


Vanessa and Kara said...


I think, as a parent, we will always be inclined to want to jump on and spin with them, even if they keep pushing us off.... I don't really know though yet ~ Kara's still so young.


Georgie said...

Just from DH's experience, his mum kept on spinning :), he eventually came out the other side. It takes THEM to realise they have a problem which is just sooooooo hard.
But they can come out the other side, I am married to proof of that :)
If I'm on the wrong track just ignore all that pmsl. I nearly stopped spinning a couple of times with DH but I'm glad I didn't. There's just too much to lose isn't there.....

Trudi said...

Thanks V, sometimes I wish they would ALL stay so young!

Trudi said...

Oh a bit of that Georgie! And a bit of a bun in the oven as well!

Georgie said...

Shit! Wish I was on the wrong freakin track with that one :(